My husband says when he first came to my door he mentally checked off a life accomplishment:  Found my wife, check. 

This was despite the fact that I had stringy, wet hair from a shower, no make-up, was impatient with his unannounced visit as I was scrambling late for work, and – here’s the real road-block – was dating someone else.  Ask him now, and he’ll smoothly say that he wasn’t worried about that seemingly inconsequential detail– he was willing to wait and confident I would soon see things more clearly.  Determined to have me in his life in one form or another, he willingly settled into the role of my very first male best friend, and bided his time. 

Things soon fell apart with my other romantic pursuit, due to circumstances unrelated to my new platonic pal.  You know the concept of something being right under your nose all along?  Well, lo and behold, there he was: an already tried and true friend, a trusted ally, an encourager, a comforter, a make-stupid-faces-so-you-pee-in-your-pants-laugh, all-round Full-Package.  A Full-Package who had long been anticipatory of the possibilities that lay ahead, and was now ready to focus his efforts to officially win my heart. 

With that unique foundation laid in friendship – something I had never experienced in any of my past relationships – a romance soon easily blossomed, in the “always meant to be” way.  Talks of marriage followed, confirmation of that old adage, “when you know, you know.” And after a year and a half of dating, I reached the day when I would be humbly presented with a token of my love’s undying affection and asked for my hand in marriage.

And Cue the Waterworks.

What you need to realize is that when a man gets down on one knee, it can be a complete emotional release for the girl.  It represents no more heartache, no more wondering, no more searching.  It means this man thinks she is SO special, SO beautiful - inside and out, and SO irreplaceable that he just had to make her his: his to grow old with, his to raise children with, his to fight through life’s currents and ultimately share in life’s joys with.  Out of all the girls in the world, he found The One who was uniquely perfect for HIM.

Shouldn’t the token of his love reflect the distinctness and careful selection of his betrothed?  The tradition of the engagement ring is a unique opportunity to demonstrate a man’s love for his bride-to-be. Don’t get me wrong – the main point, of course, is that you are in love and that you are willing to commit to each other as life partners.  In fact, you may even be the kind of guy or girl who feels a ring of any kind has no bearing on your relationship, and is therefore not necessary.  Or perhaps you’re somebody who just sees it as the thing to do – and are not really interested in whether it is big or small, passed down or bought, sparkling or dull.  After all, it is the thought that counts. 

All of those situations are perfectly fine - you and your partner may not be the particular type.  Of course, however, if that is not a description you identify with, then you have come to the right place.  Anyone can afford a big, beautiful diamond for their Love if they know what to look for and what qualities are most important to them – and you don’t need to spend ten thousand dollars to do it.  Learn how to make the diamond ring you select as radiant and as worthy as the girl whose hand it will sit on for years to come.

Making Her Dreams Come True While Still Having Money to Put Food On the Table.

Usually, a girl can be prompted to identify the one or two areas that are most important to her when it comes to her prospective engagement ring.  The key to most things in life is moderation – with a few, calculated splurges now and then.  It will be the same with your diamond.  Once you know the aspects that are really important to her- be they size, or perhaps sparkle - you can then begin the selection process.

The fun thing about diamonds is they come in a full range of qualities.  There are numerous characteristics that can be quantified in terms of their quality and then subsequently manipulated to find the right recipe to suit the individual.  Think of a sound board in a recording studio.  Each track represents a different diamond characteristic.  An engineer manipulates the volume levels of each of the tracks – some loud, some soft – a combination unique to any individual song.  It is the same with diamonds: it can have most any combination of characteristics, and YOU can determine which details are emphasized. 

There are innumerable possibilities.  Maybe she doesn’t care so much about someone peering into her rock and observing feathery imperfections (to which she says, no one’s going to look that close anyway) as she does about the crisp white color of a D-E stone (God forbid her diamond ever looks yellow next to her friend’s).  It’s up to you to identify these “deal-breakers” and then identify those details she is more willing to compromise on.  Armed with the right tools and the right questions, you will surely be able to select the perfect diamond for your bride-to-be.

Some Additional Pointers.

How to avoid getting ripped off

-         Be educated.  Learning about diamonds is a skill anyone can acquire – it’s like learning a science!  It’s fun, it’s precise, and in the end it provides you with the tools to confidently select a diamond that best suits your bride-to-be and your wallet.

-         Shop around.  Scope out several venues and compare prices of similar quality diamonds.  That way you know what kind of “deal” you’re really getting.

-         Always look for yourself.  Any self-respecting jeweler or diamond seller has the means on premises to observe any diamond under an increased magnification, and should gladly let you sneak a peak.  Of course, that only helps if you know what you’re looking for, now doesn’t it…

The important characteristics that make an incredible diamond and aspects of engagement ring shopping most people aren't even aware of – the ones most jewelers won't even mention to you!

-         In my diamond-selecting experience, often jewelers will expect you to take their word for it, as they ARE the experts.  Your local jeweler most likely will not even be considering the finer diamond characteristics – i.e., those beyond the 4Cs – as they for the most part know those details are not even on their clientele’s radar.  I’ll never forget my jeweler’s raised eyebrows and then his quick refocus to a particular diamond’s less-asked about qualifications – such as table percentage and culet – as I patiently jotted them down on a scrap of paper.  To many people, mediocrity is not an issue.  To many people, not really knowing the value of what you’re buying is not an issue.  To me – and perhaps to you – it is.

How to know what your fiancée-to-be wants in a diamond and engagement ring, and how to find out without ruining the surprise!

-         This is really a whole lot easier than you may think!  Just remember: every girl is different, and there’s a good chance YOUR girl already has an idea of what would be her dream engagement ring.  So never just wing it!  A little time and effort – and a few well placed questions – and you’ll be on your way to success!  Below are some of the more basic areas you will need to pin her down in.

Size? Is she expecting something budget friendly or something bank-breaking? Is she hesitant about it looking too gaudy? Is she concerned about its size being proportionate to her hand size? Has she been raised hearing “nothing less than a carat” from her mother, her aunts, her grandmother, and her friends? Band metal? White gold Yellow gold Platinum Silver Shape? Round Princess cut Oval Teardrop Marquise Other Most important quality to her? That it “sparkles” That no one will be able to look at it and see imperfections That it’s color will never look dull or yellowish next to another’s diamond

Where to shop (and where NOT to).

-         When my husband first started looking for diamonds, he tried some reputable sites online.  The only problem with that was, since he didn’t know what he was looking for at first, he kept getting unsatisfactory diamonds arriving in the mail that he would just have to send back, again and again.  Put in a little time now, and save a TON of time – and shipping costs - later!

-         Different jewelers have different standards.  Chances are you will be dealing with different quality diamonds when comparing a mall jeweler to a private family business.  Learn how to size up an establishment’s inventory and get the quality that satisfies YOU.

How to ensure your sweetheart LOVES her engagement ring and make yourself a hero in her eyes.

-         Remember: she loves you.  This is your chance to put in some grunt work to show how much you love her too.  Believe me; a girl knows that this sort of thing isn’t necessarily what gives YOU the same warm and fuzzy feeling it’s going to give her.  And that’s all the more reason why it’s so special – you invested the time to pick the perfect ring because you knew how much she would cherish it. 

-         After all, she is going to have to look at it everyday for the rest of her life!  Be confident and feel good in knowing you carefully and lovingly selected her diamond.

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